Grief is a bare, forceful being

I think the last three days have been the most emotionally draining three days I've had in the last 23 months.  

There is no destination in this process. 
No place to "get to." 
I think the realization of that may be one of the most difficult things. 
Knowing you have to keep going. 
Knowing there is no other side of grief. 
Knowing there may not be any closure, ever.
Knowing that trauma might still win.  
It is absolutely exhausting trying to turn loss into healing. 
It's impossible. 
We don't get stronger, we get harder. 
We don't get better, we just become better liars, mostly to ourselves. 
Grief is a bare and forceful being.